Handling Teenage Defiance
We have all seen it and many of us have been through it. The teenage years of rebellion when your innocent child would seemingly start to do the exact opposite of what you would tell them to do. However, this is a weird time for teens as well. Raging hormones, peer pressure, social expectations, and so many other things that go on in a teenager’s life make them react this way. The real question though is how would you respond effectively to such a situation.
Set the basic principles
Clear boundaries and principles are important during the teenage years. This allows the teenager to learn to respect you. Rights and responsibilities go hand in hand. Breaking rules has consequences and follow through with the consequences you set for misbehavior.
Open Conversation
Having an open conversation about what is going on in your teenager’s life is important. The problems, the pressure, anxiety, and day-to-day struggles. You may hit a brick wall but consistency and openness will eventually open a dialogue.
Be their role model
Your child is watching you more than they are listening to you. This model behavior. Do what you want them to do. Be what you want them to be.
Encourage good behaviour
Every time they do something that is good and behaves in a proper manner, encourage them and let them know that you appreciate it. This will motivate them to improve themselves even more.
Accept that they can make mistakes too
Not only teens, but all humans make mistakes. To be overly idealistic would be wrong. Be patient with them and encourage them when they make honest mistakes.
Be rational and strategic
Be in accord with your spouse
If you are having frequent verbal fights with your spouse, then your teen will think that this is normal behavior and talk to you in the same manner. Maintain a healthy environment in the house so that this doesn’t happen.
Always remind them how much you love them
Your teen can be rebellious, they can make mistakes, and they can be very disobedient at times. But at the end of the day, they still love you and you still love them. Always let them know that you will be there for them.
